Ask Sarita: Beauty, Body, Love

Sarita loves to answer your questions, so if there’s something you’d like her advice on, please email her and let her know if you are happy for it to be published (you can remain anonymous). Here she answers a question on: what is true beauty?


Dear Sarita,

I feel I have some issues that may hold me back in life.

I would like to be able to liberate myself from them, and become more empowered, so I can explore and experience more of my potentials in life.

I would like to be more aware, feel more confident about my body, and work with the truth of how others including lovers might perceive it. I also feel interested to explore naturism, but am nervous and shy to get started.

I would like to explore all the possibilities and depths of sexuality, and would like to understand and be more aware of all the issues between men and women, what’s going on with the ‘cultural’ conditioning through our media etc. about what is considered to be normal, attractive etc., is it harmful, and can anything be done to improve things and bring about harmony between and for all men and women.

Not sure if somebody could offer me some support. Is there really a consensus of what or who is beautiful and ugly, or has it been pre-conceived mostly through ‘cultural’ influence. Also, if we’re on a genuine spiritual path, how important and relevant is perceived physical attractiveness to us or anyone else?

Love James


Hello James,

About your question, I see you have concerns about whether you are beautiful or ugly, and how to move beyond these concerns into deeper intimacy and fulfillment with others, and especially in relationship. It is a very wise step you are taking to go into naturism. We were of course born naked. It is very liberating to go over the hurdle of believing that we should be viewed only with clothes on. Clothes function almost like an armour, if we are not able to remove them freely, and be innocent like a child with our bodies. If you go to a naturist place, you may be surprised that everyone looks beautiful when they are naked, much more beautiful than when they are wearing clothes. This is because the mask is off, and we see more of the real person shining out.

About beauty or ugliness, the old saying that beauty comes from within is really true! To understand what I mean, look at photos taken of old American Indian people, with very weather beaten faces, full of wrinkles, and yet looking so beautiful. Or look at a Sumo Wrestler, so very fat, and yet so graceful and shining with focused energy and power. Look at an anorexic fashion model, who is supposedly so beautiful, and yet how very sad to see her gaunt cheeks and hollow chest, with not a feminine curve in sight. Look at the tiger, or the dolphin, each one shaped so differently and yet each one so unique and so beautiful.

What makes something ugly is incomplete life issues which pile up, creating stagnation and stress in the body and mind. The most powerful fuel for beauty and attractiveness is a combination of Love and Awareness. This will bring you back to your centre, a quality of coming back home to who you really are. If you feel there are burdens from the past sitting heavy on your shoulders, do de-conditioning work, such as Primal Therapy, Bio Energetics, Breath work, Dynamic Meditation, or Colour Light Therapy. This will cleanse you and bring freshness to your being. If your body is dull, take steps to eat organic food, get proper exercise, and do regular cleanses of the organs. As you find ways to bring the body, emotions, mind and soul into harmony with each other, beauty will definitely shine from within and people will notice this.

In order to take such positive nurturing steps, it is necessary to love yourself enough to receive the gift of health and joy offered by life. Just remember, you are worthy of love, worthy of joy, and worthy of health. You are worthy to be a bright shining star. Find out what is your unique gift, and cultivate it, watering and nurturing your gift till it is radiant with creative expression. And invite others to join you in sharing this.

Love Sarita

Picture of flower copyright Shivananda

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