Ask Sarita: Living Passionately

Sarita loves to answer your questions, so if there’s something you’d like her advice on, please email her and let her know if you are happy for it to be published (you can remain anonymous). Here she answers a question on: living your passion.


Beloved Sarita,

After reading your blog about passion (August 2012 newsletter) I need to write to you.

I do not know what to do. I hate my life situation and I do not know how to change it. I hate living in a big city, I hate my work in the office. Since I was a child I wanted to travel the world to admire the nature and help others, to feel one with the whole world. When I wanted to live with my passions (traveling, nature, dancing) my parents wanted me to be rational and practical to have a good job. They told me I knew nothing about life and was young and stupid, so they know better what I should do. And I believed them. I studied a lot, I did a PhD and know I have a job I hate. My life runs between dreams and depressions. I had treatment with tablets. I had problems with my parents, with my husband and felt guilty with my poor children seeing me unhappy, nervous and absent.

When I participated in your Tantra group I discovered a new life. I felt energy inside me, love, passion, LIFE, GOD. Since then I am thinking only about going THIS PATH. When I am trying to meditate at home or in my office I feel the soft energy. I dream about quitting my job and present life. From this life I would like to take only my children and go, I do not know where. I feel Tantra is my life. My secret dream is to attend all your courses and become your follower. But it seems so unrealistic, as I feel so weak, stupid and like a little baby in Tantra. I know there is a long way for me to go. Even my husband finds it funny when I am thinking about that. So I kept it deep only in my dreams as unrealizable. And suddenly when I was talking about changing my work because of the next depression I am falling in, my very wise therapist entered me into the deep contact with myself and told me to see my vision. When I had no courage enough to think about Tantra HE TOLD IT INSTEAD OF ME! And in that moment I began to breathe deeply, cry, laugh, moan with pleasure. It was out of my control. He told me to stand, and run in my place and then to stop. And I felt Kundalini. I was shaking very strong and felt the energy in my hands. Since then I know I have to go on This Path.

But… I do not know how to do it, because of technical problems. To be able to attend the Tantra workshops I need money, so I have to stay in my hated job and have no time for my little children. I have to stay in it also because the money earned by my husband it is not enough to live. And the next problem is that we have nobody to carry our children during the Soul Mate Training we would like to attend. It would be too cruel to leave them with stranger like baby-sitter. They are very close to me and our 3 years old son would cry all night. I do not want to go to LOVE through the suffering of my children. I could go to the Tantra courses alone without my husband, but I am afraid about our relationship as we have serious problems in it. During 2 months after your Tantra course in June it changed a lot between us, but now we are so tired, frustrated and always in a hurry, that the atmosphere in our home is bad. We were trying to make some meditations and this what we have learned in Tantra in the evenings, but after the whole day of working and carrying our children we were so tired as it was by force and the next day we were even more tired, nervous and frustrated.

I know the most important for me is to have time for my children (I do not have it now because of my work), to be a conscious mother and Tantra. Do you see any possibility for me? I feel there are a lot of people in this situation.

Lots of love,



Hello Gigi,

Thank you for your question and for allowing us to use the answer in the newsletter. I believe your question and the answer can help many people who may find themselves in the same or similar boat.

One thing I have discovered about following your passion is that, when we truly trust in our soul calling, life supports us to follow this path with ease. If we do not fully trust, then it is necessary to juggle what we really want with what we believe we should do. In your case, of course you care deeply about your children, and have stated at the end of your email that your children come first. I agree with you to a certain extent. The best transmission a mother can offer her children is for her to find her true happiness. If she drags herself through life doing her duty, she is giving that as a transmission to her children.

My mother left her husband, (my father) after 30 years of marriage and 7 children. I was 12 years old at the time. She transformed before my eyes. She went from being a depressed, wrinkled crone to being the most ravishing and beautiful woman. She learned to drive, got a job, got lovely clothes, and began following her passion. It was such a great gift to me as a child. A huge weight lifted from me, because I had before me a new role model, a mother who was not afraid to risk everything to follow her dream. It helped me to follow mine.

You are obviously called to the path of Tantra, and also, are anchored in a reality check, that it may be very arduous to follow me around the world. I am not clear about your position with your husband. If you would like to breathe new life into your relationship with him, then it will be a very wise decision to do the Couples Tantra Training. This training has about 2 groups each year. In-between groups, there is homework that you do together to continue evolving in your love. If you are worried about being separated from your children, then I would suggest bringing a nanny to the group venue, who can look after the kids and you can see them in the breaks, ie at meal times.

If you would like to practise Singles Tantra, then you can do whatever group appeals to you, and then weave this teaching into your life, slowly but surely going through the transformation you crave. For people who love Tantra, but cannot go anywhere, it is always an option to do the online Tantra course I offer.

One of the basic teachings of Tantra is that you can enter the door of transformation from wherever you are. There is a lovely sutra from the Vigyan Bhairav Tantra, “Just as a hen mothers her chicks, mother particular knowings, particular doings.” Motherhood is a very profound meditation. It is to be in service and to inspire. I feel for your predicament, and at the same time, I am aware that this is the path you have chosen, the path of the mother. You can of course practise Tantra and be a mother. The two are compatible. It is just a matter of logistics how you will manage this.

I am holding space for the creation of an eco village resort, where people can live and breathe Tantra by living in a space dedicated to this lifestyle. While waiting for this to manifest, the Tantra I teach is more like a travelling circus! I am always touched and amazed, how many people do manage to follow me around the world. The people who apprentice with me have to be really dedicated to follow their heart’s calling. The Teacher Training I will be offering next March in Chateau Bellevue should make it much easier for those interested, to be trained in the art of teaching Tantra.

I am sure your heart will guide you into the best possible direction.

I send you many blessings

Love Sarita

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *