Ask Sarita: Bardo Meditation

Sarita loves to answer your questions, so if there’s something you’d like her advice on, please email her and let her know if you are happy for it to be published (you can remain anonymous). Here she answers a question on how we can help the soul of someone who has suddenly died move on.


Dearest Sarita,

My dear friend Megan has had a big shock – her sister dropped dead last night, without any sign of having been ill. Megan is concerned that she will have been unprepared, and would like to try to help her through meditation and prayer.

I remember you told me about a beautiful meditation for someone passing over – and wondered if you would be able to send me the details? It would be so appreciated.

Much love,


Dear Sarah,

Certainly that must have been a big shock. I enclose below the meditation method. I received this mediation while sitting in the cave which was inhabited by Mary Magdalene when she was in France after the crucifying of Jesus. My partner’s father had died that day, and we were intuitively drawn to that cave to sit in silence and send blessings to him.

While we were sitting there, a magnificent angel appeared in front of me and gave me the instructions for this meditation. Since then, I have used it whenever someone close to me has died and it has had a really profound effect each time.

I have also taught it to people and they have been greatly benefited by using it. This meditation is not only good for the one who has died. It also helps those left behind to transcend their grief and come to a place of deep peace. This is because grief upon the death of someone is enhanced if the person has left this world with a lot of unfinished business to attend to, meaning they have not done enough work in their inner world and are carrying heavy things from their past. This heavy energy creates feelings of sorrow in those left behind. With this method, you will be able to clear the unfinished business. It is rather like going and helping a friend clear out their closets.

The instructions for the meditation are as follows:

Bardo Meditation

Each day, for 10 days, those who were close to the person who died, can sit in front of a picture of the person with a lit candle there as well.

Energy follows intent. The person will send their intention to the picture and the candle that they want to now join the loved one where they are in the Bardo on a subtle energy level. You will find yourself being drawn into a certain dimension, according to the level of consciousness the dead loved one is in.

The one who is dead will be passing through several bardo layers, which appear as realms, or alternate realities. Each day you will be visiting one bardo realm. Your job is, once you are there, to focus your complete attentiveness and awareness into this space. This will function like a light in a house full of shadows. Whatever is unclear in the person’s consciousness will begin unwinding. There may be memories, incomplete issues, and un-lived emotions coming to the surface. These will translate into dreamscapes, i.e. they will appear as real to the dead person. This can be hellish or heavenly, depending on how much unfinished business a person carried in their life.

Just be there as a non-judgmental presence, shining the light of awareness. The dead person’s consciousness will automatically begin a complete cathartic process of unwinding the stuck patterns that inhibited them in life.

Remain there for 20 minutes and then blow your candle. Come back. Use hand gestures, the hands moving in opposite directions to break the flow. Release yourself from the Bardo realm, and affirm out-loud that you are now leaving the bardo realm behind and are returning back to this earth plane and to your life and your body. Then, wash your hands up to the elbow with fresh cool water. Put away the photo of the dead person.

The next day do this process again, and continue every day for about 10—12 days. Each day you will find your loved one in a new dimension, a new bardo level. Within 10 days you may experience your loved one being drawn into the light.

After that, do one more session, which is to offer a prayer for a higher consciousness re-birth. For those with psychic sensitivity, you will actually be able to see the new birth and what will be the new destiny of your loved one.

When someone has died, it is a good idea to cover the mirror they used to use with a black cloth. This is because when a dead person is confused, they will try to find themselves by going to the mirror they are used to and looking for their face. They actually need to be helped to move towards the light, not to hang around this earthly plane. This is why cremation is better than burying. With burial, the dead one may try to get back into their body and this creates the phenomenon of ghosts. With cremation, they are forced to go towards the light and break the attachment to the body.

If you go to the funeral or to the cremation, it is important to wash all clothes you were wearing immediately afterwards, including your shoes. Take a shower and wash your hair as well.


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