The Magic of Tantra and Erotic Arts of Sexual Union

The Creation Of An Online Master Class

At the time of writing I am on the magical Island of Bali working on the filming for a new online course devoted to the subject of learning how to be a Master Lover. It is a true creative challenge to take such a vast subject and try to capture it on film for the benefit of couples everywhere. However, I am working with such a great team of gifted individuals that I am sure it will manifest as a true work of art.

As I carefully create a visually and information rich course, I am once again reminded how valuable the subject of sexuality, love and relating is. When people are well educated on the subject of sexual relationship, we have the very real possibility of living a fulfilled life in all its ecstatic potential. Due to a general lack of really good sexual education, many people move through relationships in a state of tortured confusion, never really figuring out when, why and how things went so terribly wrong.

Becoming a Master Lover

After taking part in my Master Lover weekend group, many people have commented: “If only I had access to this information when I was a teenager, how much more fulfillment I could have experienced in my love life! I could have avoided so much pain and anguish in life!” This type of comment really touches my heart and makes me wish to make a difference in this world around this subject. People also say to me, “Education doesn’t teach us what really matters in life, how to work with emotions, how to truly love a man or a woman, how to be happy! Tantra gives us what we have been truly seeking!”

Men and women are opposite and yet complementary in our sexual and relationship needs. Here, I offer some of the most valuable tips for creating a magical sexual life:

The Spiral Dynamic for Men

Imagine a spiral with the center of the spiral being the sex center. A man’s energy is naturally focused very strongly on the sex center.

Similar to the way ripples form, when you throw a stone in the lake, moving from the center to the circumference, so it is with male sexual activation. Begin sexual activity with a man by honoring his lingam first and foremost. Once he is aroused, and feels his potency rising up, you can then spread this awakened sexual power all over his body by stroking down his legs to his feet and up through his torso to the shoulders and down his arms and out of his hands. This will help him to feel recognized and understood in regards to his nature and will also help him to expand his capacity for whole body pleasure states.

Only after he has been honored at his lingam should a woman link up with other areas of his body. It is also very supportive for

Tantra Essence

Parvati worshipping Shiva through his Lingam

his sexual awakening, to massage his solar plexus, honoring him as a sun God. The solar plexus chakra is the space where all contradictions meet. When a man allows himself to become vast enough to contain all contradictions, he will finally be able to hold a woman, as she is a creature who is made of contradictions! The first contradiction a man needs to embrace within himself is power and vulnerability. By massaging him in his third chakra, you will be helping him to open to his own contradictions and to become a shining sun who provides radiance to all beings.

Another area to awaken through loving massage is his neck and shoulder area. A man tends to carry many burdens on his shoulders, and this tension needs to be released if he is to become a really great lover. As a woman massages his neck and throat area, this simultaneously awakens his capacity to become a co-creator with the divine in service of nature.

Massaging his feet, further helps to ground him in this natural world, and in his divine masculine form. Once he has been thus honored and awakened, the woman can move again into adoration of his lingam, taking his arousal to new heights. Continue spreading his aroused energy through his whole body, and in this way, you will be preparing him for full body orgasmic states.

The Spiral Dynamic for Women

Now imagine the feminine spiral with the center of the spiral being her sexual center. Begin sexual activity with a woman by focusing on the circumference of her body. Placing your hands on her shoulder and knee creates an ambience of safety and trust for her. Holding her lower belly in a state of pure presence can follow this, helping her to open up her second chakra and emotional fluidity. When a woman feels that she is being honored in her natural emotional fluidity, her whole sexual being will open like a flower.

Next, you can honor her heart chakra and her breasts through loving massage. The two nipples have nerves that link directly to the clitoris and the clitoral network. A sensitive breast massage goes a long way in allowing a woman to access a more complete form of sexual arousal.

In erotic love play with a woman, it is also essential to honor her at her third eye center, gently stroking the forehead from between the eyebrows up to the hairline, several times. When she feels recognized and honored in her centers for emotional fluidity, love and intuition, her Goddess nature awakens; she becomes a whole woman. She may laugh or cry, sing and undulate in full body ecstasy. The man becomes like a master musician, with the woman being the instrument.

For a woman, it is important to very slowly and progressively move towards her sex center. Let the approach be teasing and inviting rather than direct. The same way you would approach the inner sanctum of a temple, is the way to approach a woman sexually. As we move into the courtyard of a temple, we simultaneously enter into awe, lingering in front of a beautiful statue to pray, or stopping to admire the stained glass windows before finally entering into the space where we will encounter the holy of holies. A woman’s Yoni is a place for reverence and awe. If a man can approach his woman in this way, her ecstasy and surrender with him will know no limits.

Common Scenarios in Sex

What usually happens in patriarchal influenced sexual scenarios is that the man is expecting the woman to behave just like him, therefore, he gives her what he would like, i.e. sudden and direct stimulation of the genitals with a quick entry into penetrative sexual union. This will certainly turn most women off completely leading to the sad phenomenon of faked orgasms. (It was found in studies regarding women’s sexuality that 50% of women fake orgasms.)

With the advent of women’s liberation we see another sad portrayal of sex, when a women expects a man to behave just like a woman. She may ignore his sex center completely and demand that he first open his heart and share about his deeper feelings. Then she wonders why she has a lover who behaves more like a girlfriend than a boyfriend!

The Subtle Art of Adoring Your Lover

If a woman can learn to express her complete worship and adoration of her man’s lingam before anything else, she will be amazed that he will then easily and naturally open his heart. And vice versa, if a man can honor, love and worship his woman as a Goddess throughout her entire body, before connecting with her genital area, she will yearn to open her legs to him.

Erotic Arts of Sexual Union

Some people may believe that what I have just described is foreplay for the sexual act. I would like to nip this thought form in the bud. What I have just described is an essential component in lovemaking as a whole. It is not a preliminary for the ‘real thing.’ It is the real thing! It will be better for all humans if we delete the word foreplay from our vocabulary. We can replace it with a far better description of sexuality: ‘erotic arts of sexual union’. Without erotic artistry, sex is a pale ghost, in no way living up to its potential.

How to Experience Complete Sexual Fulfillment

Another misconception regarding sexuality, which is essential to clear up is the idea that sex is only about peak arousal leading to a goal of genital release. I use the word genital release, simply because orgasmic states may come with genital release, and can also happen without genital release.

To understand what a completely fulfilling sexual union for both the man and the woman will be, it is necessary to consider the ancient Chinese Yin Yang Symbol. The black portion represents yin (feminine nature), which is fluid, yielding, intuitive soft and cool. The white portion represents yang (male nature), which is hard, goal oriented, powerful and warm.

Within the black portion of the symbol is a small white circle and within the white portion is a small black circle. These are there to illustrate the fact that when you move totally into a yin experience, a portal will automatically open into yang. And when you move into a yang experience a portal will automatically open into yin. Life is a continuous flux between yin and yang, male and female.

If you apply this principle to sexual union, this reveals to us that a sexual union cannot be fulfilling unless it contains equal yin and equal yang. In Tantra, the yin experience of union is referred to as ‘Valley Orgasm’. It is revealed to us in Tantra scriptures that Lord Shiva and his consort Paravati used to ride seven peaks and seven valleys during love union, making love for six or more hours at a time.

Even if you experience a minimum of one peak and one valley, your sexual union will be tremendously enhanced. You can play with this suggestion, perhaps sometimes moving into one peak and one valley, sometimes two and other times three peaks and three valleys. In terms of timing, a loose and natural way to experience this is to have 20 minutes of yang, followed by 20 minutes of yin, and continue riding these waves as long as you like. Just remember, equal yin, equal yang. This recipe, will catapult your sex life into unimaginable ecstasy.

I hope this blog will inspire lovers everywhere to try these erotic tips I am offering you. For those reading this who are really excited to try it out but would like further guidance in exactly what to do and how to do it, you will be benefitted by:

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